How to Lower Your Sex Drive

Dealing with an unwanted sex drive can be difficult and lead to uncomfortable feelings and situations. If you’re looking for ways to escape urges in the moment, look to distraction and mindfulness. You can also use relaxation as a way to cope with stress instead of letting stresses build up. If you are a man with a high sex drive, then you can look into herbs or prescription medications as a way to lower testosterone and make some balanced lifestyle changes.

Diet Changes

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    Take herbs. Herbs have long been used to help with physical, mental, and emotional problems. Chaste Tree Berry, also called Monk’s Pepper or Cloister Pepper, historically was used to help monks maintain their celibacy.[1] Some people use licorice to reduce testosterone. Licorice is an anti-androgen, which means it can block or inhibit testosterone production, which can lower sex drive.[2] Red reishi and Chinese peony are some things to add to the diet to help reduce testosterone.[3]
    • Consult with a medical professional and/or herbalist prior to making any changes to your supplements and herbs.
    • You may wish to speak with a naturopath, acupuncturist or herbalist for more information on safely taking herbs.
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    Drink tea. Some teas can help with lowering testosterone and sex drive. Spearmint tea and licorice tea are herbal teas that can help reduce testosterone.[4] Find a medicinal grade tea and brew as indicated.
    • While grocery store teas may have some effect, they may not be as potent as medicinal teas. Carefully select a tea that suits your needs or consult an herbalist for a medicinal grade tea.
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    Watch your fat intake. Carefully watch your diet and your saturated fat intake. Diets low in LDL saturated fat can positively affect libido and testosterone production. Get some blood tests to see where your cholesterol is at, and make some substitutions if need be. However, don’t go overdosing on fatty food as these can cause harm to your arteries and contribute to long-term damage for your heart.[5] Find a balance that can affect your sex drive but also not cause long-term harm.
    • Sources of high saturated fat include butter, palm oil, coconut oil, and bacon fat.[6] Low saturated fat options include consuming non-dairy milk and plant-based protein sources like tofu, nuts, and beans. And as always, eat more veggies.

Lifestyle Changes

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    Distract yourself. If your sex drive is distracting you and you can’t focus on what you need to do, find a small distraction. Go on a walk, paint, read, or write. Put your attention to something else. Distract your mind or distract your body by focusing on other things.[7]
    • Play a game or complete a puzzle.
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    Exercise. If your body is tense, get moving. Go to the gym or exercise. Do some yoga or more vigorous exercise such as kickboxing. Moving your body can help you distract it for the moment. However, be mindful that exercise can increase testosterone production, so be careful in how often and how intense your workouts are.[8]
    • Periods of intense exercise followed by little recovery time are not recommended as a way to lower testosterone.[9]
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    Try meditation. If you find yourself distracted by sexual thoughts, meditation is one way to refocus your attention. Meditation can help improve concentration, emotional regulation, and positive emotions. Plus, you don’t have to be an expert meditator to get these benefits; just starting a meditation practice can help. Small steps matter.[10]
    • Start with 10 minutes of meditation each day and work up to 20 minutes each day.
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    Practice mindfulness. Mindfulness is a way to tune into your own bodily sensations. While you might turn off your mind for meditation, you want to focus it in mindfulness. If you’re focused mostly on your sexual organs, perform a body scan and attend to each area of your body, from head to toe. Focus on your senses instead of your thoughts or sexual feelings.[11]
    • Tune in to one sense at a time. For example, take a moment and really listen. Hear the birds chirp or the hum of the air conditioner and fully turn your attention to what sounds exist around you.
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    Use relaxation. Find some healthy outlets for stress, such as relaxation. Handling stress on a regular basis can help you cope with increasing sexual tensions and deal with them daily. Instead of letting tensions mount, practice relaxation for 30 minutes each day to help you deal with buildups of stress.[12]

Professional Help

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    Speak with a therapist. If feelings of shame, guilt, fear, anxiety, or other troubling emotions are tied to your high sex drive, you might benefit from therapy. A therapist can help you sort through your emotions and explore them in a meaningful way. They can help support you to express and experience healthy sexuality. Your therapist can help you create safe and healthy boundaries around sex. While talking to a therapist might feel uncomfortable at first, it can be helpful to work through any difficult or lingering emotions that may affect your sexual expression.[13]
    • You can find a therapist by calling your insurance provider or local mental health clinic. Speak to your physician or family and friends for a recommendation.
    • Sometimes people with heightened or lowered sex drive have issues to sort out around sexuality in their own family, and/or unresolved sexual abuse.
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    Lower testosterone with medications. Some medications can be used to lower testosterone levels and ultimately, lower your sex drive.[14] Talk to your physician about what options may be available to you. While medications can effectively lower testosterone levels, you may experience adverse side effects as well.[15]
    • If you experience adverse effects, consult with your prescriber immediately. They might change your medication or your dosage.
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    Look at deep brain stimulation. Brain stimulation in the hypothalamus appears to help reduce sexual drive. While extreme, this type of treatment may beneficial for people who are hypersexual or for those with an extensive history of sexual deviation.[16]
    • If you’re interested in this type of treatment, take to your physician and see what opportunities might be available to you.
Dr Rohit Bhaskar, Physio
Dr Rohit Bhaskar, Physio Hey, I am founder of Bhaskar Health and completed my Graduation in Physiotherapy from Uttar Pradesh University of Medical Sciences. My clinical interests are in Chest Physiotherapy, stroke rehab, parkinson’s and head injury rehab.

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